Wednesday, 30 August 2017
Saturday, 19 August 2017
Healing the inside
I've
had to drift away into my own little land of self healing lately after
experiencing some health challenges. It has been a daunting time and a great
reminder that no matter how well life may be going, surprises can come along
without any notice and change everything in an instant. How we choose to cope
with these events is individual, but our mindset and the choices that we make
can have a huge impact on the outcome of our situation.
In
my article Awakening the Heart I
discussed an experience from my yoga retreat where I had to view myself as a
child and as a result of this experience, I felt like I needed some inner healing
and in particular, healing of my inner child. A few weeks after my yoga
retreat, I went to see a medium (psychic). I chose to pay the medium a visit
after losing my dear Nan (who you can read about in Live
Your Life with Meaning) last year. I felt like I hadn't had much time
to grieve for her and felt this might be a good experience to help me heal from
the grief of losing her.
When
I had my reading, one thing that the medium mentioned, with my Nan and Grandad
spiritually present, was how they felt I was in need of some inner healing.
"Yes", I thought, "This was something that I learnt on my recent
retreat". It felt like a little more confirmation that I did indeed need
to work on healing my inner child. So I set about work and started off the
process by emailing my mum with a few deep rooted questions. Some questions I
got answers to and others I realised I would never have the answers I was
looking for, but either way, I felt able to let those things go.
I
gave myself a pat on the back. Good work! I questioned "Am I healed yet?
Or is there more I could do?". And then I noticed a DVD out of the corner of my eye sitting on the shelf. It was as though it has been sitting there, waiting to be watched for years. I had even carried this DVD through an international move when I had thrown so many others away. It caught my eye and I had this feeling sweep over me that this DVD had been
waiting until right that very moment for me to put it to work. The DVD was
called 'The Shadow' by Debbie Ford. I switched it on and followed the exercises
one by one.
'The
Shadow' teaches us that we all have a dark side as well as a good. And that
dark side is our shadow. The DVD educates on how we should not be ashamed of this
part of ourselves but should instead embrace it and put it to use in ways that
are useful to us. So now I had dealt with my demons and accepted my dark side.
A
month or so later after after having attended a few medical appointments, I found out that my
body was unwell. So there was in fact more of me that needed inner healing than I had
first thought. I needed to heal both emotionally and physically. My emotional
pain came from my past and from the loss of a wonderful women who had played an
extremely important role in my life. And my physical pain, I wasn't even aware
of until the combination of symptoms were pointed out to me and linked
together.
So
I can tell you that I have been working very hard to heal my inside in every
kind of way. I listened to my inner voice, I listened to my nan and grandad, I
listened to my body when it chose to communicate with me and I listened to myself, to
my voice of reason that repeatedly tells me to never give up and always do
anything and everything possible to achieve the best outcome.
When I was given
a diagnosis, I realised just how important my health is. Without it, I would
not be able to participate in any other part of my life. For me, my health
concerns were physical, but health problems can be both mental and emotional
too.
When I decided to
heal myself, I decided to go full throttle. I questioned about my nutrition, I
educated myself so that I could understand what the tests being done on me
meant. I looked into alternative medicine and treatments. I allowed myself some
rest time. I allowed myself some time for meditation. And of course, I continued yoga!
If you sense that
any part of you is in pain and needs some healing, think about the ways in
which you think you could go about healing yourself. Do a brainstorm and write your ideas down. And then take those ideas and make them actions. By allowing
every part of you to heal, you are allowing yourself to become the fittest and
strongest that you can be and with this strength and energy, you can truly
accomplish anything that you desire.
Monday, 22 May 2017
Taking a Giant Leap into Your Dreams
Back
in 2004 I ended my first serious relationship. We had been together since we
were 17 years old, just kids really and had wanted to grow up too quickly. We
got engaged at 19 and then as we began the road into adulthood, the cracks in
our relationship started to show and the differences between our desires became
too visible. So 5 years on I decided to take my path alone. It was a very scary
experience for me. This human being had become my family and life without him
seemed daunting.
A
co-worker at the time stepped in and offered me a book to read called 'Feel the
Fear and Do It Anyway' by Susan Jeffers (Thank you Susan, you changed my life
to the point of no return!). I willingly accepted. This book was my
introduction to self-help and opened up a whole new world for me. I really did
not know that I had so much power to change my own life.
In
2007, whilst on a date with an interesting young entreprener who was collecting
properties in London, I was introduced to the world of Tony Robbins through the
guy I was dating. After reading a couple of books written by Tony, I signed
myself up to a 4 day event called UPW (Unleash the Power Within) hosted by Tony
himself. I remember the ticket, which was in the cheap seat section by the way,
costing me £400. This was for a full 4 days, attending 12-16 hours per day. I
thought it was real value for money!
However, when I shared the news with friends and colleagues of mine at the time, a number of people remarked "what are you wasting your money for?" or "these things are a scam!". Erm, excuse me? I felt gutted to hear such responses. I was single and living in London. No-one was queueing up to join me on holiday, so this was my treat to myself. Others in your life often don't want you to change, so they say things that are likely to hold you back. Does this sound familiar? They don't want what is best for you, but what is best for both themselves and their relationship with you. And most of the time they're not aware that instead of protectng your relationship with them, their lack of support is actually causing damage.
I
got so much out of attending the UPW event. I lived through 4 days of high
fiving strangers, dancing, singing, goal setting and stepping complety out of
my comfort zone. Admittedly it felt a little cult like, but that didn't matter.
In fact it was comforting. I was in a room with 12,000 others who just like me,
were looking for growth and to make their lives better.
After
attending that event I signed myself up to study a part-time psychology degree
and 9 months later I left the country to live in the sun. I'm still living in
the sun and I haven't looked back. And in 2013 after 7 years of part-time study
whilst also holding down a full-time job, I completed my psychology degree.
After
having started my degree, I often contemplated over what I would do with it, if
anything. Why did I choose to study psychology in the first place? The
assumption is often made that anyone wanting to study psychology must have a
lot of issues to resolve. Now, I won't deny that relations with every family
member isn't perfect and there are things that I wish hadn't happened or had
happened differently. Neither will I deny that I did come across a few people
through my studies that certainly did study psychology for this reason and may
I add, probably for the better of the public! But, I didn't ever feel like
this was my reason.
As
I was approaching the end of my studies, I pondered some more as to what I
would do next. Had I been sweating the books for the last 7 years for any
particular reason? And eventually I had a 'lightbulb' moment. Of course, what
I really wanted was to share with others the learning and growing I
had achieved myself. So I decided I wanted to follow the path of Tony Robbins
and practise NLP = Neuro-Linguistic-Programming.
I attended a 2 day event that introduced me to a number of courses available to
me and a coaching model used by the academy. I left the event motivated and I
was later called for a follow-up session to see what I had thought about the
event and if I would like to register for one of the courses. My answer was...
"not right now". Can you believe it? After all of this hard work, all
of a sudden I wasn't interested. What had happened?
Well, as I said, it was towards the end of my degree that I was looking into it. So I still had some work to do and the thought of starting another course at the same time was a bit much. So I will forgive myself there. So what I actually said was 'not right now, but probably later'. Time moved on, I found new excuses to replace my old one and it just didn't happen. I let other interests in my life take priority and had pushed my dream to one side.
Recently,
5 years on, I was thinking about it all over again and wondered why I never did
sign up to one of those courses. Why hadn't I followed my dream? As I thought
about it, I started to get motivated once more, but something didn't sit right.
It dawned on me that all along I was focused on NLP but I wasn't sure this was
really an area for me. That was Tony Robbin's thing, but was it really mine? He
is a Guru of mine, but that doesn't mean I have to be just like him. I felt as
though I was searching for a missing piece in my puzzle.
I
thought to myself "why NLP? Surely you want to start with the
basics!" And that was it! That was my next light bulb moment. I didn't
want to be an NLP coach, I wanted to be a coach. NLP may be a great tool to
have later, but right now, I just wanted to start with the basics. And the
truth was that it was this uncertainty that had side tracked me for so long. So
I browsed the courses once more and there it was; DIPLOMA IN PERSONAL
PERFORMANCE. Ding! Yes, please!
I
spoke to my husband that night and signed up for the course the next day. I
took that Giant Leap into my
Dreams!
Does
this story bring anything to mind that you know you wanted to do, but have been
ignoring? Is fear or uncertainty holding you back? If this rings true for you,
question why you are not doing it. What REALLY is it that is stopping you from achieving this goal of yours? I'm sure you have many things that you would like
to do. And so I will end this post with an exercise for you to follow so that
you too can take that giant leap ito YOUR dreams.
Go
get em'
Exercise:
1.
Take a blank piece of paper and number 1-10.
2.
Make a list of all of the things you would love to do, but haven't, yet. Start
with the bigger things and follow with the smaller things. An example of a big
thing might be BECOME A COACH, whilst a smaller thing might be GET A DOG or
even smller might be PLANT A ROSE BUSH.
3.
Now go through your list and prioritise the things you have listed. So the
thing that you want to do the most is number 1 and the least important becomes
number 10.
4.
Now you can make a new list titled 'Goals' that puts the items in order.
5.
Take another look through your list and decide which item would be the easiest
to achieve. This goal is going to be the first one that you work on. Because, to
have the motivation to achieve your bigger goals, you need to experience how
good achievement feels and carry that feeling through with you.
6.
Write down step by step how you will achieve this easy goal and be specific as
to when you will achieve it. Write down when you will achieve the first step
and each step after with a target timescale for when you will have completed
the goal.
7.
Once you have completed your first goal, you can go back to your Goal's list,
strike a line through the goal you have achieved and then go to the top of
the list and start working on the goal that is most important to you, one step
at a time.
Good
Luck!
Monday, 10 April 2017
Eggs with Egg-free Mayonnaise
I was sitting at the breakfast table and as I looked down at my
plate, it occurred to me how ludicrous the combination on my plate may seem. I
was eating eggs, but had specifically chosen to shop for egg-free mayonnaise.
The thought tickled me and I felt the need to share and educate on the paradoxical
scenario.
My choice to become
vegetarian manifested as a result of the growth in my awareness of animal suffering. Whilst I still have
doubts about how healthy it might be to consume animal products like dairy and
eggs, I do still consume them, however I now pay alot more attention to the products that I purchase and try to do so as ethically as possible.
I chose to find a
local organic farm that let their chicken's run around free range and I visit
the farm regularly to stock up on eggs. As I have a child, it's also a great
activity to take her along so she can see the animals and learn about life on a
farm. The eggs cost just 25 cents each (€) so are very affordable and my family
can rest with a clear conscious knowing that the money we pay for those eggs
is being used to pay for the organic vegetables that are fed to the chickens
who are running around in a natural environment and living a happy life.
At some point the hens will stop laying eggs and at some point, they may be slaughtered. It doesn't happen to all egg laying chickens, it is a choice made by the farmer. But the important point is that the chickens are not suffering whilst they are here and they are living the life that a chicken was designed to live.
Most supermarkets
stock eggs that come from caged hens or barn hens. A caged hen will spend its
whole life in a cage until it stops laying and then it is slaughtered. A barn
hen is free from a cage but will likely never see sunshine and will suffer the
same fate. And they are fed the cheapest grain available. These hens that live without light and eat bad food then get eaten and digested in the bodies
of humans. Did someone mention cancer?
Organic and
free-range eggs in supermarkets are usually too expensive to rationalise as
being affordable. My advice is to cut out the supermarket giants and go
straight to the farmer. It's a beautiful experience and a little less weight on
your conscience goes a long way too.
So why then do I
choose to buy egg-free mayonnaise? It's because I don't know anything about the
eggs that are used in standard mayonnaise but I could almost guarantee that the
eggs come from caged hens because caged hens are the cheapest way of keeping
hens. With cages, the farmer can stack the caged hens in shelf by shelf all
around his barn. And I choose not to support this lifestyle for the hens.
So, there you
have it; Eggs with Egg-free Mayonnaise. It's a bizarre combination but an ethical one. Always be aware of the choices that you are making when buying products. We vote with our money and your vote counts!
Sunday, 2 April 2017
Awakening the Heart
I recently attended a 3 day yoga retreat on the beautiful island
of Gozo located in the Mediterranean Sea just south of Sicily. After an
exhausting two years spent raising my daughter through her dramatic baby years and
promising myself that I would find my Zen, it was time for me to take a few
days out as a way to refocus my mind and allow myself the still time I had long
craved.
I am a keen Yoga
goer. I find it helps me hugely in so many ways. I find my yoga practice to be
a place of peace. Everyday-life in most parts of the world involves noisy
traffic, people rushing, children crying and there is always a job or task that
needs doing. In yoga, it all just stops. The only things you need to think
about is the workout you are doing, the rhythm of your breathing and tuning-in
to the voice of the teacher.
It also happens
to be a great way to exercise. The poses involved work effortlessly to tone
your body and for any sufferers of joint pain, the stretching in yoga can bring
great relief. Yoga also works well as a stress reliever through the various
breathing techniques.
The focus of the
retreat which I attended was to 'Awaken the Cosmic Heart'. I'll admit that when
I signed myself up for the retreat I wasn't entirely sure what I was signing
myself up for! I knew I loved yoga and knew I was in need of a break and some
silence, so the thought of a yoga retreat seemed ideal. But what was this about
awakening my cosmic heart? Did my heart need awakening?
Feeling ever so
slightly sceptical, I arrived at the venue where I was to spend the next three
days. It was a beautiful farmhouse, with outbuildings, stunning gardens, a
swimming pool and sea and country views. I was already in heaven. I was
introduced to a girl that I would be sharing a room with for the next two nights.
Did I say a room? No, I mean a bed! Now for me, that really was the first step
to awakening my heart because I hadn't shared a bed with another female since I
was a teenager!
We started our
first session shortly after my arrival and got in position on our mats. I
instantly felt at peace. Yoga manages to magically calm you,
motivate you and connect you with those around you all at once. We then took
part in an activity where we had to draw, using shapes and symbols, how we saw our
lives and how we saw ourselves fitting into those lives. We then shared the
outcomes with the group.
I learnt from
that activity that I was satisfied with my life and my accomplishments but that
I felt that sometimes I didn't feel like I could be all of myself with the
people in my life.
We later indulged in a vegan and gluten free feast and chanted the sounds of the 7 chakras 108 times. If you want to know why 108 times, do some homework on hindu religion and beliefs because I wouldn't want to explain it incorrectly here.
By morning I was feeling more alive and ready for my next yoga fix. After yoga we did some crazy dancing known as Ecstatic dance where we let go of our frustrations and anxieties by throwing our bodies into the music with our eyes closed and moving however our intuition told us to. For a full 60 minutes! This was followed by a sound healing session, giving us the opportunity to stand in a drum and get gonged into balance. I didn't really think much of it until someone in the group requested some feedback and based on the little I knew about that person already, the 'sound man' was incredibly accurate with his analysis.
After dinner we settled for an 'Inner Child Workshop'. Now this one got me! Again, I wasn't expecting too much, I was just happy participating in order to get my break and do some yoga. We were asked to visualise ourselves as a child when we were between the ages of 5 and 7 and show this child some love in whichever way we felt necessary. We could talk to the child if we wanted to. It sounded like a game of my imaginary friend to me but I went along with it.
It disturbed me when the realisation came at how anxious I felt when visualising myself as a child. My inner child had nothing that she wanted to say. She looked up to me at the person I have become but also looked at me with a sad fearful look that communicated she wanted to be cuddled. I felt for that child because I knew the events she still had to live through and from the look on her face, she knew them too. I left the workshop feeling uncomfortable and in need of some inner healing.
The final day consisted of some more yoga, crazy dance and a couple more workshops, both of which struck me as being quite powerful. In one I had to thank my father and my mother individually for their roles in my life. My father has given me very little in life and he left this world when I was in my teens. He wasn't much of a role model and so to thank him felt like a difficult task and something he did not deserve. The task made me feel very emotional, but it also brought me the realisation that he has actually been doing his duty all along. He serves me better as a spirit guide than a human one and he makes my life easier by not being here to cause me problems and letting me live in peace. We were asked to pick an angel card from a pile after this task and my card read 'love is being sent to you from above by an angel that loves you very much and wants you to know you have nothing to worry about'. If I had been sitting on a chair, I would have fallen off of it!
The other workshop was an intense experience of dance, intentions and someone coming round and holding us closely and firmly whilst telling us how special and powerful we are and that we are loved. I felt pretty damn good and inspired after that particular experience.
So, did I come away with a heart that had been awoken? I cannot answer that question with a direct yes or no because so much more came out of the weekend despite my inital scepticism. I learnt a lot about myself. I learnt that I have spent many years of my life trying to make my outside world a success but that my inside world also needs some work. And to work with healing your inner self involves showing yourself love. If we cannot show ourselves love, we are not going to be too successful at giving it to others.
I learnt that my mother and father were and are perfect after all. Because they have and are fulfilling the roles that make me the person that I am and choose to be. They gave me life which is a bigger gift than any other person has ever given me. And for that I am truly grateful.
Finally I learnt that in 3 days, a farmhouse full of strangers can become a family and heartfelt friends. And if it's possible to love strangers in a matter of 3 days, there is so much more love to give to those people in our lives that we cherrish.
And I reaffirmed, that I love yoga.
Monday, 20 February 2017
Together We Can Save The World
Today whilst driving to my
yoga lesson, I found myself held up by a slow-moving truck. As I looked up to
process the truck in more detail, I saw countless chickens staring back at me.
The cages were stacked on top of each other and side by side filling the whole
truck. There were hundreds of the poor things sitting there, all squashed in
with barely space for them to breathe.
As I
continued behind this truck I found myself distracted, thinking about the
chickens. At first I acknowledged that, at least the truck was driving slowly,
taking care because chickens were on board. But then it dawned on me that these
chickens were probably being taken to slaughter. My heart sank. The thought
troubled me and I felt like I wanted to help the chickens. I wanted to stop the
truck, open the cages and set them free. But instead, I sat there powerless.
And as I came to a roundabout, the truck drove off in one direction and I in
the other.
Thoughts
of the chickens have stayed with me. Hundreds of thousands of chickens get
slaughtered every day. They haven't done anything to deserve it. It just breaks
my heart.
I
don't eat chicken. Or any other meat. Or fish. It hasn't always been the case. Whilst
I was a vegetarian as a teenager and should have stayed true to my intuition, I
did return to eating meat for many years. But one day, I just couldn't do it anymore.
One day I decided that nothing needs to die for me to live.
I've
heard the arguments of evolution, nature's cycle of the food chain and was even
fooled for a while believing we were doing them a favour by 'giving them life'
because they wouldn't come here otherwise. But the conditions that most of
these animals are kept in is appalling. It's not a life. They are not living.
Some animals in animal agriculture never see sunlight. Some only get to live
outside but have their heads stuck between bars and can barely move. It's all
about cost saving at the animal’s expense.
Whilst
I admit, I am wholeheartedly an animal lover and I don't believe they should be
born into this world unless it is to live a fulfilled life, there are now many
other reasons being revealed as to why eating both meat and fish everyday
doesn't work! Consumption of meat has been linked to Cancer, the carbon
footprint of animal agriculture is hugely responsible for destroying our planet
and our oceans are emptying out, hugely impacting the ecosystem.
For
more info, please visit www.cowspiracy.com
There
are also several documentaries that you can watch to better educate yourself
such as Earthlings, Cowspiracy, Meat the Truth, Forks Over Knives, Food That
Kills, The End of The Line, Sea The Truth, Shark Water and more.
You
don't have to stop eating meat to make a difference. Whilst this is the ideal
solution to the problem, there are a lot of meat lovers out there that cannot
bare the thought of not eating meat. But, simply by reducing your meat
consumption, you will make a difference to both your health and the health of
the planet. One veggie day a week is all it takes. And, you can support
projects such as Supermeat who are working to produce
meat without killing animals! In addition, by eating Organic meat, you are
supporting animals to live better quality lives.
Together,
we are much louder, together, we are much stronger, together, we can change the
world!
In
honour of the beautiful chickens being slaughtered tonight, I'm so sorry I
couldn't save you but I hope writing this post may help your cause. 💜
Thursday, 16 February 2017
Celebrate Every Single Day
We often live for the
future. And sometime we spend time thinking about the past. But how often do
you find yourself living within the present? Reflect on your own life (visions
of the past spring to mind) and consider if you have been and are living your life
in the present and enjoying each passing moment.
The world is made up of many
different characters with different viewpoints, perspectives and outlooks. And
some I struggle to understand. I hear people around me pass comments such as
"I don't want a fuss for my birthday" or "let's not bother with
presents anymore", " Chrismas is off this year", "Holidays are a waste of money".
Now, it's true that our
lives can become one long whirl of never-ending events. Birthdays, Anniversaries
and Cultural Celebrations fill up the annual calendar and before we know it,
the year has passed us by and we begin the same circuit all over again. It can
get tiresome and sometimes seem pointless.
But stop for a minute and
think about what you are doing here on this earth. I can guess your answer, because
we're all in the same situation. We don't really know! However, what we do know is
that one day it will end. So, I fail to understand why such people are not
willing to make the very most of their lives. None of us know how much time we
have left.
Every single day should be a
celebration. I'm sure if you think about it, you can find something each and
everyday that you can be happy about. Something to get excited about. And if
you can't, then find something. I get excited everyday about my first cup of
tea of the day. And that's just to start, but it's an example. I look forward
to drinking my tea and I am grateful whilst drinking my tea. I live happily in
my moment of tea drinking. What do you enjoy?
Every action you take is
your choice and you don't have to enjoy the journey if you don't want to. It's
your life! But what do you achieve out of not bothering? How fulfilled do you
feel now and how fulfilled will you feel when you're knocking on heaven's door?
If today were your last day
on this earth, would you have any regrets? Are there places you want to go?
Goals you want to achieve? Have you been procrastinating?
We don't know if any of us
are coming back to this earthship, so let's not waste our opportunity to make
the most of our time here. Go everywhere, do everything, make it affordable,
stop procrastinating, be present in every moment and celebrate every single day!
Wednesday, 1 February 2017
Embracing Change
Four months ago, we faced
the challenge of an international move. I wasn't unhappy where we lived before.
I loved our house, I loved the views and all things were in place so that our
life moved along smoothly. We had favourite restaurants, classes we attended
and local businesses we were loyal to because we liked the way they cut our
hair or sold the products we like to buy.
So
to give up a happy life was not particularly an easy thing to do. However, we
are adventurous souls and the idea of exploring somewhere new was too tempting
for us and so we chose to take on the challenge.
After
arriving, we took on a property that was the best of a bad bunch available at
the time. Then 2 days after moving in, the landladies (2 sisters) decided to
increase the rent by an additional 25%! We had a contract but with being in an
unfamiliar country and also finding out that the landladies lived one on top of
the other in a building opposite the property, we felt we had no choice but to
give in to their demands.
The
property itself was in a concrete jungle. It had no views. The garden was an
internal courtyard and not a bush could be seen in the street outside. My poor
cats were devastated. Where would they roam?
Now,
you're probably wondering how this negative background information could
possibly empower you to embrace change. But I tell you all this so that you can
have an understanding on where my mindset was heading. Our exciting adventure
had turned into living in a concrete city with no good places to walk our dogs,
nowhere for our cats to explore, no views and no idea about where to eat, where
to buy things or who to trust.
I
cried.
I needed to try to keep myself together, I had a young child who was
looking up to me and who was also experiencing a whole world of change. But
when she would head to bed at night and my husband returned from work, he would
ask me how my day was and I would cry.
Now,
I'm a fighter. I do not welcome bad luck. Bad things do not happen to me, they
are merely challenges that need solutions. So, I kept myself and my little girl
busy by signing us up for every type of class I could find and then gave myself
a break by signing myself up for a weekly yoga class. We started to meet people
and friendships began. And in the meantime, I searched and searched and
searched every property I could find that might possibly make my family, myself
and my furries all happy. And eventually we got there!
We
have now moved into an amazing family home. I have my views back. My Pets are
happy again. And we are learning our way around. Giving up wasn't an option.
And accepting unhappiness wasn't an option either.
Change
is daunting. But so too is the thought of a life that is exactly the same
every-day, every-year.
Our lives should always be moving forwards,
and never backwards.
If there was one thing in your life that you could change, what would it be? And what is it that you would need to do to implement that change? What solution can you come up with to fix this one particular challenge?
I invite you to move your life forwards and embrace change.
Sunday, 15 January 2017
Learning to Love Yourself
2017 for me is all about finding my zen.
There have been a number of periods in my life where I have found heart
warming happiness and relaxation but it has only ever lasted for a short period
of time. Either my situation or circumstances have changed or one negative soul
or another has witnessed my positive mood and set out to destroy it.
As the years have passed I have learnt not to let other people's actions
or reactions have much of an impact on my well-being. But events are a
different matter. Life can get stressful sometimes and it's easy to let one
burden after another distract us from the goodness in life. We become fixated
on our problems and lose sight of ourselves.
So it's important that we regularly check in with ourselves. We can
often spend all of our time looking after others, running errands and working. But we forget to ask
ourselves 'Am I okay?'. Or think 'What could I do today to improve myself?'.
I am guilty of frequently putting myself last. My child, my husband, the
2 dogs and the 4 cats will all get their breakfast before I do. I will make
appointments for my child, or encourage my husband to go and do his hobbies but
I will often make excuses for myself; "I'd love to go on that course but
my family needs me" or "I could do with some time out, but it's not
fair on my husband when he's been working all week".
Well HELLO 2017, that is all about to change! I am finding my zen and
therefore the first step I must take is to Learn to Love myself which includes
looking after myself. I invite you to join me!
I am just back from having spent a night away from my family staying at
a 5 star hotel. The hotel was only a 10 minute drive from my house but it
did not matter. I felt like I was a million miles away from my everyday
routine.
When I got to the hotel, I checked in and settled into my room before
heading to the hotel Spa. Having booked myself in for a Full Body Stress Buster
Massage, a beautiful and well made-up masseur was waiting to greet me. Yes
please! After my massage I took full advantage of the spa facilities, enjoying
a swim in the pool, a bit of bubble bonanza in the jacuzzi and some relaxation
time in the sauna and steam rooms.
In the morning, I woke up fresh after a good night's sleep in a king
size bed that didn't have a hundred cats scattered over it or my husband
snoozing next to me. I did some yoga, indulged in the amazing hotel buffet
breakfast and then went back to the spa for a Reflexology Massage and a Facial.
I then had a shower back in my room and got ready in my own time before meeting
my family in the hotel reception.
Reflecting on my night away; I feel far more relaxed, I feel happier,
I'm in a better mood around my loved ones and I can actually look in the mirror
and like the person staring back at me. I look like I am glowing instead of
falling apart. And I certainly feel like I love myself far more than before I
left. But, in addition, I have also realised that this is only the beginning. I
had thought that one night away would solve everything, however whilst my body
and my muscles don't ache as much, they do still ache and whilst I feel
relaxed, I could still feel much more relaxed. I need to go much deeper than
this to find my zen.
Now, I realise that my trip was rather extravagant and not everyone will
have circumstances than will allow them for such a big spend, but there are
still plenty of things you can do to allow yourself time for yourself. It may
be sending your family out and having a pamper session at home followed by a
few circuits around the house twirling to your favorite rock band. Or you could
arrange to stay with a friend or relative, a change is as good as a rest. Or
even better, house sit for someone! Have them pay you to relax in their
house!
Or maybe you don't have to get away from anyone, maybe loneliness is
what you need a break from. In which case, joining a group or workshop might
give you the buzz that you desire to make yourself feel good. The solution for
you really depends on your own personal situation and needs. Get creative and
give yourself a break!
Whatever you decide to do, just make sure that you do, do something for
yourself. We all deserve to feel at peace and we all deserve to be rewarded and
feel loved. It has to start within ourselves.
I would love to her about your experiences. Please feel free to comment
or contact me on admin@deepyvocal.com
Friday, 13 January 2017
Time
Time
is not my friend. Time hasn't been my friend for quite some time. Time was my
friend when I was younger, when I moped around the house complaining "Mum,
I'm bored!". But as the years have progressed, time is an element in my life
which has become more and more restrictive. And it's the same story for most of
us.
Time
ages us. God, I hate time! I see my life passing me by and the wrinkles forming
on my face. I notice each birthday another year being added on the clock and
sometimes I feel like I am watching myself from the outside in, aging, losing
time and see those around me growing older too.
Time
wasn't there for me in 2016 when I needed to grieve. Time decided that 'it was
time' to just carry on. I needed to take care of my household, I needed to take
care of my family. Then, just as I was pulling up my socks and getting on with
life, I needed to find more time to deal with more grief. And just as I
was dealing with that, my husband landed a new job across the Mediterranean Sea
and I had to find time to sell many of our things, pack up our remaining
belongings and transport 6 animals and a small child to a new life in a new
country.
Time
causes stress. One of the biggest reasons people suffer from stress and anxiety
is because they are fighting time. There just never seems to be enough of it!
Tick tock, tick tock, STOP!
And
yet, time is what makes our memories. Time is each and every moment of each and
every day. When I reflect on my life, I think of the 'best times' as well as
the 'worst times'. When you really take a step back and look at the big
picture, all we really have is time.
It
is our choice how we spend our time. In 2017, my intention is to organise my
time in order to make time. Time for me and time for you. The time has come to
enjoy time. Join me and enjoy your life.
Happy
2017!
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